Galaxy of Terror (1981)

Galaxy of Terror is a cheap, sleazy and goofy attempt by Roger Corman to cash in on the Sci-fi boom of the era.

The plot sees a spacecraft off to a distant planet to rescue the crew of another ship. But, the mission goes wrong when the rescue ship itself crashes. Then, the crew start to come under attack from what appear to be demons from their own minds.

Any right thinking trash hound will immediately be attracted by the cast. There is Robert "Freddy Krueger" Englund. The captain of the rescue ship is Grace Zabriskie aka Laura Palmer's mom in Twin Peaks. And one of the crew members is Erin Moran, otherwise known as Joanie Cunningham from Happy Days.

The film is often described as an Alien rip off. This hinges on one particularly unpleasant scene of a female crew member being raped by a slimy tentacle creature. The other deaths revolve around hallucinations linked to their subconscious.

Galaxy of Terror feels like it was shot in a weekend. But, there is a good grungy, Dark Star feel to the production design and special effects, partly due to a young James Cameron.

Unfortunately, a jumbled baffling narrative and too many slow dull patches make the film hard work and less fun than it should be.

The Funhouse (1981)

While not a classic, The Funhouse takes some of the standard 1980s slasher tropes and mixes them with a unique setting and some occasionally imaginative filmmaking.

The plot sees teenager Amy (Elizabeth Berridge) going on a double date with Buzz (Cooper Huckabee), Richie (Miles Chapin) and Liz (Largo Woodruff) to a carnival. Once there, they ride the rides, eat dodgy looking food and, being teens in a slasher film, smoke pot, and make out. Richie has the bright idea that the four of them should spend the night in the funhouse. What they don't realise is that they are locked in with a deranged carnival employee who has already murdered the fortune teller.

There's plenty of genre clichés, such as nudity drug use, a POV shot from behind a mask (with a creepy - not in a good way - punchline). There's also not a whole lot of action on the first half of the film, with the emphasis on the creepy unwholesome end of the carnival, the freak shows, burlesque dancers and mutant animals. The carnival is almost a character in itself and there is very much an "us and them" attitude of the carnival workers to the outside world, reminiscent of Leatherface and his family in Hooper's earlier classic The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

The shocks and suspense come once the teens come under threat, with director Tobe Hooper makes the most of disorienting location helped by dizzying editing and photography that plays up the lurid colours in the climactic confrontation. Kudos also to Rick Baker's gooey mutant creature work and John Beal’s orchestral score.

My Bloody Valentine (1981)

My Bloody Valentine has little in the way of scares but there is enough gore and enough of a deviation from the usual slasher film template to make it stand out from the crowd and be worth a look.

The story (which, weirdly, reminded me of Jaws) takes place in the little coal mining town of Valentine Bluffs, where the residents are planning their first Valentine's Day party in 20 years. The last time they held one, there was an accident in the mine, an accident caused by the mine's safety officers being at the party. Only one man, Harry Warden, survived, and he killed the people responsible and ordered the town never to have another Valentine's party. So, what could possibly go wrong?

The cliché with slasher films is to have the story revolving around sexually charged teenagers, but here the story revolves around adults with jobs. What also sets this apart from others in the subgenre is the way director George Mihalka makes use of the locations, tying the story to the coal mining town (a real one in Nova Scotia was used) something which grounds the convoluted, slightly silly story, and the mine itself certainly adds to the claustrophobia.

A film where a deranged killer is cutting out people's hearts with a pickaxe is not going to skimp on the gore, so it's no surprise to hear that My Bloody Valentine suffered at the hands of the censors. The version doing the rounds now has had some of this restored, and the blood certainly gives a shocking jolt of energy which goes someway to compensating for the lack of inventiveness in the kills.

Scanners (1981)

Best remembered for the iconic scene of an exploding head, courtesy of make up legend Dick Smith, Scanners has a fascinating central idea but is hampered by a wooden lead actor and a plodding, sometimes messy script which fails to make the characters as interesting as the premise.

Scanners are people with extraordinary X-Men style psychic powers, able to join with, read and control the minds of others, with sometimes terrible side effects, such as in the previously described head explosion. One of them, Daryl Revok (Michael Ironside) has clearly let that power go to his head as he is hell-bent on world domination using Scanners loyal to him. The mysterious Dr Paul Ruth (Patrick McGoohan) wants to stop him, using both the resources of his employers, the shady ConSec Corporation, and one Scanner, Cameron Vale (Stephen Lack) who has not fallen under the spell of Revok. But as the bodies pile up, so do the questions, as nobody seems to be who they say they are.

Cronenberg made Scanners during the first phase of his career, a phase that also included Shivers, Rabid, and The Brood, and out of this astonishing, disturbing and bloody body of work, Scanners is easily the weakest. At this stage of his career as a filmmaker, Cronenberg had never been one for involving human drama, preferring to use his characters primarily as a means to explore themes and ideas. In this respect Scanners is no different, but what those other films all had was a little something extra.

With Shivers and Rabid it is a lurid energy, betraying their exploitation film roots. The Brood had a human interest story, and for all the blood and perverse scenes still feels like a heartfelt and personal work. Scanners has none of these, and after the initial shock of the exploding head, Cronenberg moves away from the unique sexually charged body horror of his other earlier work towards a more conventional sci-fi / spy genre, crossover film, with evil scientists, car chases and guns. Disappointingly, the exploding head does not occur again, and, coupled with some clunky scenes of expositional dialogue, and an odd departure of one main character, it rather leaves the impression that not all the kinks and loose ends in the script had been ironed out before filming commenced. Perhaps the most notable missing element, certainly one I found surprising for a Cronenberg film, is sex, both in terms of sexual chemistry between the leads and any kind of sexual desire in any of the characters.

The other big liability is the actor in the main role, and while Stephen Lack may have surprising large blue eyes that make for a memorable face, here his delivery is stiff and wooden, sometimes to the point of sucking the life out of a scene. Scanners does have two aces in the cast, Patrick McGoohan and Michael Ironside. McGoohan brings gravitas and believability to the character of Dr Ruth, while Ironside gives Revok a charismatic unpredictable menace.

Smith's excellent make up skills make a comeback in the explosive finale between Vale and Revok, and also worth a mention is Howard Shore's score, a mix of dramatic sweeping strings and cold eerie synths that blend seamlessly with the images on the screen.

Polyester (1981)

Polyester sees John Waters send up and celebrate suburban life, as well as taking barbed swipes at religious extremists, soap operas, Alcoholics Anonymous and foot fetishists. It also features one of the most memorable cinematic gimmicks since the glory days of über huckster William Castle.

Housewife Francine Fishpaw is watching her life crumble around her. Husband Elmer is having an affair with his secretary, her promiscuous daughter is two months pregnant, her son is a juvenile delinquent, she feels like she is a bad daughter to her own mother, and the only way she can cope with all of this is by hitting the bottle. So far, so standard melodrama. But scratch beneath the surface of that synopsis and a completely different world appears, twisted and rebuilt through the combination of a low budget and a uniquely camp and warped sensibility. Francine is played by mega sized drag queen Divine, her husband is owner of the local X-rated cinema, her daughter is a perpetual motion go-go dancing machine, her son is a foot fetish freak known as the Baltimore Stomper, and her mom is a coke sniffing bully and thief.

The core of the film is a parody of melodramatic soap operas, and many of the plot twists and turns are not much more convoluted than appear in those. As well as mocking the sort of problems that characters in soap operas face, Waters also mocks the simplistic solutions of the genre. The son comes straight out of a few months’ probation, as a clean, sober and law abiding citizen, channelling his foot fetish into his art, while the daughter discovers macramé and becomes a mellow peace loving hippy – all of which is interesting, considering that Waters has long had a second career teaching in prison.

Unlike the subject matter, the cinematography and shot composition is often quite flat, which may be a consequence of the low budget, but it may also be a deliberate choice, as a counterpoint to the outré subject matter. There is also a wonderful eye for detail, such as the importance of the home or the obsession with brand names.

On it’s release Polyester came to cinemas with the added bonus of ODORAMA. 

This has roots in the eye catching audience enticing novelties of the likes of William Castle and his penchant for getting the audience to experience to some extent what is going on in the film, as well as a short lived gimmick called Smell-O-Vision. Smell-O-Vision was a system that released smells during the showing of the one film associated with it, a crime flick called Scent of Mystery. With ODORAMA (as explained by a Dr Quackenshaw during an hilarious short prologue) audiences are given a scratch-and-sniff card with ten distinct numbered odours. When the appropriate number is displayed on screen, you scratch the matching one on the card and get a nose full of whatever Francine is inhaling at that time. However it is not just an empty ploy as smells are a recurring theme throughout Polyester, at times driving the plot and the shock revelations, as well as some of the gags.

Even without ODORAMA the film is never dull, with some great throwaway gags (my favourite: the Drive-In cinema showing nothing but art house films, with Champagne and Caviar on sale in the lobby), references to Waters' cultural obsessions such as Patty Hearst and the Manson Family, and a soundtrack by the likes of Debbie Harry and Michael Kamen.

The star of the show is, of course, Divine, who pulls off the rare trick of making an unbelievable character seem, if not totally believable, then largely sympathetic. Along with the star, the supporting roles are played by members of the "Dreamlanders", the troupe of oddballs, misfits and actors used by Waters for as long as he has been making films. Edith Massey holds her own amongst the histrionics as Cuddles Kovinsky, the wealthy, simple minded, eternally cheerful best friend of Francine, while Mink Stole puts in a striking turn as the adulterous secretary. Outside of the regulars, 50’s heartthrob Tab Hunter makes a noteworthy appearance as Todd Tomorrow, the too-good-to-be-true beau who appears in Francine’s life, just when she needs him most.

More than three decades after its release, Polyester, still manages to be hilarious and transgressive, and, like Dr Quackenshaw says, “…some odours may shock you, but […] some things in life just plain stink”

Halloween 2 (1981)

Being threatened in a supposedly safe place is a classic and effective horror trope, and one that, being set largely in a hospital, Halloween 2 exploits as well as its predecessor did with the domestic setting. However, while capably shot, directed and acted, the script, (written, like the first, by John Carpenter and Deborah Hill) is something of a let down. By showing too much of the killer and his back-story, we lose the ambiguity that gave the previous effort an unsettling depth beyond the surface shocks.

Continuing directly after the events of the first film, the murderous Michael Myers is still on the loose in the city of Haddonfield, despite being shot six times by his psychiatrist -turned-nemesis Dr Loomis (Donald Pleasance). Myers heads to the hospital where one of his targets, Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) has been taken, and we now find that there is a reason why he is after her - a chilling reason, of which both Laurie and Dr Loomis are completely unaware.

As mentioned, compared to the first film, Halloween 2 sees Myers take a more central part of the story, both in terms of his increased screen time, and some revelations about his past. This, however, is a mistake, as showing more of him diminishes his mystery and power, while the confusing back-story, with hints of links to the supernatural and ancient pagan rituals, feels poorly and barely thought out. It eventually becomes something of an irritating distraction, and the big shocking twist, the reason Michael Myers is stalking Laurie, ultimately feels shoehorned in, as another afterthought.

Ironically, some of the best and most effective elements are those that feature Myers in the background or do not feature him at all. By about half way through the film, jittery townsfolk are seeing his shape everywhere, and a lynch mob (another classic horror trope) is trying to smash up his old family home. Here, we realise, once again, how much more effective a monster Michael Myers is, when we do not see him, only the consequences of his actions. 

For example, in one of the best scenes in the film, a nurse runs to the hospital car park to try and get away, only to find the tyres on her car slashed. As she looks around, she sees another car with slashed tyres, then another, and another, and with mounting horror, she realises that every single vehicle in the car park has been sabotaged. What kind of person could do this? Someone unhinged or somebody supernatural? It is this sort of behaviour, bewildering, almost impossible to believe, and largely unseen that works best, and would be spoilt by having too much explanation. 

The other significant change is how much more explicitly violent this film is compared to the first. This, presumably, was done for commercial reasons, with the flood of slasher films released in the three years between Halloween 1 and 2, continually upping the gore ante, and, more importantly, the audiences lapping this up. This is not a criticism of cinema violence itself, as that is often the whole point of the slasher genre, to entertain (or offend, depending on your viewpoint), with ever more elaborate and imaginative killings. However, when everyone is doing that, it is the one who is not who stands out, and in that respect, Halloween 2 remains merely a part of the crowd.

However, in other respects Halloween 2 does stand out from other slasher films of the time. For all the flaws and half thought out ideas in the script, it does try to something different and a bit more complex, by having two story arcs, that of Laurie and Loomis, run separately throughout, only bringing them together at the end. In addition, director Rick Rosenthal does take time to set up some of the characters and situations, which stops it becoming a conveyor belt of killings.

Halloween 2 also invites some interesting thoughts on two subjects that inevitably crop up in Horror – sex and death. Firstly, although it might on the surface look like one of the inevitable slasher movie clichés, I was fascinated by how slowly Myers stalks Laurie through the hospital corridors. Granted, she is heavily sedated for a lot of the film, which stops her from running very quickly, but other times she could get away easily. Why does he not walk any faster? In that respect, Myers becomes, like the zombies in George Romero films, a symbol of death and our own mortality – slow but inevitable, no matter how fast you run.

Secondly, a frequent criticism levelled at slasher films is misogyny, and while there may be a debate to be had about other films, particularly the linking of female, often teenage, sexuality and violent death, there is little of that in Halloween 2. Admittedly, the main female character is largely passive and has to be rescued by men, but there is a crucial difference between this film and Halloween, or, indeed, its many imitators. 

In the original, where his motives are more ambiguous, and all of the victims are teenagers who engage in drug use or premarital sex, it is possible to see Myers as some sort of force of Puritan vengeance, punishing people for their sins. However, here, there is no suggestion of a sexual agenda to either the killings, or the stalking of Laurie Strode.

Conversely, however, it does mean that Halloween 2 lacks some of the sense of danger, and even the uncomfortably perverse streak that other slashers have. Watching these films does not automatically make you a misogynist, and they can raise, sometimes uncomfortable, questions about the attitudes of the characters, the film-makers, and perhaps ultimately you, the viewer.

Lacking these sorts of extreme elements, what is left with Halloween 2 is a competent, workmanlike slasher film that, aside from the unique elements of the franchise, has little to heavily distinguish it from the scores of others in the genre.

Le Professionnel (1981)

Although probably best known outside of France for his lead role in Godard's groundbreaking Breathless, Jean Paul Belmondo has had a long career in cinema, largely in more mainstream fare, such as comedies, or action films like Le Professional. Some sloppy scripting, and unremarkable direction stops this from being a classic, but the effortless charisma of the star helps makes for compelling and enjoyable viewing.

Belmondo plays Josselin Beaumont, a French Secret Service Agent, who is sent to a fictional African country in order to kill the ruling dictator, Colonel Njala. However, before he can carry out his mission, Beaumont is betrayed by his government, who decide they would rather have Njala alive, and left to rot in a prison camp. Breaking free, Beaumont returns to Paris in time for a state visit by Njala and vows to complete his mission.

The story is somewhat hokey and relies a little too much on coincidences (not least Beaumont breaking out of prison at the same time as his target is heading to Paris), as well as the repeated incompetence of the Secret Service, such as a surveillance team not recognising the man they are supposed to be watching, but the script moves along at a fast enough pace (after just 15 minutes of screen time, Beaumont is out of Africa, and that is pretty much all of the back story we get) that you do not dwell too much on these. There are a few other elements of the story that remain unexplained, such as how he gets back into France from Africa undetected, but these actually work to enhance the character of Beaumont. By leaving an air of ambiguity around some of his actions, it gives him an aura of mystery, unpredictability and danger, so that you never know what he is going to do next.

Beaumont is no clean cut goody-goody hero, but closer in spirit to the James Bond of the early Sean Connery era, someone for whom getting the job done is the first priority, regardless of the impact on the lives of other people, whether it is his wife, his mistress or his guilt-ridden former boss. In the hands of the wrong actor, this could lead to an audience turning against the lead character, but Belmondo has bags of charm and charisma, and can play him as unflappable and dangerous without ever coming across as smug or psychotic.

Standout amongst the supporting cast is veteran actor Robert Hossein as Inspector Rosen, the policeman locked in a cat-and-mouse game with Beaumont. Cooly sadistic, uninterested in the politics and history of the situation, he will go to any lengths to get his man, and proves to be the only serious threat to Beaumont.

Behind the camera, Georges Lautner does a competent if unremarkable job, with no particularly flashy directorial touches, apart from in one breath-taking scene of a car chase through the streets of Paris. The superb stunt work, combined with tight editing and shots from inside Beaumont's car make for an adrenaline packed experience, as well as leaving no doubt that Belmondo is doing most of his own driving.

Special mention should also go to the score, which largely revolves around an Ennio Morricone composition, "Chi Mai", actually written ten years previously for an obscure Italian film, Maddalena. Restrained and quite haunting, it is up there with the best of Morricone's other work. Brits of a certain age will also instantly recognise it as the theme from the 1981 BBC serial The Life and Times of David Lloyd George, off the back of which it got to number 2 in the UK Singles Chart.

The story revolves around French intervention in Africa. However, in this film, there is no real examination of the history or implications of any of this, and Africa serves merely as the catalyst for the events in the script, albeit a catalyst that would be familiar to the target audience, in the same way that Iraq or Afghanistan might be used nowadays in a British or American film. Le Professional is not a heavy political allegory or a deep demanding character study, but a solid enjoyable thriller, carried largely by the roguish appeal of it's star.